


Don't Cry for Me

by blueeyes_and_hockeysticks (i_am_greg_lestrade)



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Angst, Drug Use, Overdose, Rehab
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-10
Updated: 2016-12-10
Packaged: 2018-09-07 17:24:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 748
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8809516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/i_am_greg_lestrade/pseuds/blueeyes_and_hockeysticks
Summary: It all came crashing down. 
The inadequate feelings. 
The uselessness. 
It all came crashing down.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Trigger warning for drug overdose

Heartbeat.

That's all Jack could hear. His heartbeat. The buzzing in his head was fluctuating, thumping in time with the too-quick pulse in his temple and chest. The strobe lights around him at the party (Who's party was it again?) were flashing irregularly, making dots in his vision.

He stumbled over a step in the living room to the foyer (Familiar doorway, I know that art...), landing on one knee on the hardwood. A part of him said that he should be in pain but he wasn't. He was low. So so low, so so relaxed.

Drunk.

High.

(Oh fuck, where did Kenny go?) His eyes scanned the moving, soundless bodies around him, looking for the shorter blond guy. (My party) he finally remembered, smiling to himself. A girl touched him on the shoulder, smiling and laughing, talking. Jack heard nothing. He just gave a smile and nodded, heading off to go upstairs.

His room was dark. Empty. He turned on the light and shut the door. (Phone) Fishing the device from his pant pocket, he tried desperately to make his eyes focus on the line of texts on his lockscreen.

 

_'Where did u go?'_

_'Dude where are all your pills'_

_'Fuck jack answer'_

_'I'm going home'_

_'Nvm, where r u?'_

 

Jack laughed, silent in his own ears. He worked the keyboard, his hands not doing what he told them to. (Too much?) He hit send.

_'Roim, kennby. Haha where r u eh?'_

He stumbled more into his room, his legs a bit numb (Weird). He shrugged and opened his pill container again, dumping what he thought we're 2 pills into his hand. Everything was blurry. But calm. Quiet. He liked it. He tipped his hand over his mouth, dumping them in.

He swallowed. He smiled.

Taking a few more steps, the high fully hit. His mind went spinning, careening out of control. His arms and legs were shaking, breathing coming in short bursts.

(This is a panic attack.)

Jack fell, head hitting the floor. He laughed, a hysterical sound he couldn't hear, the bottle popping open again to spill little pills over the floor. He reached for them. (One more?)

His arm wouldn't pull back to his body. Everything was numb now. (Hit my head, oops.) He didn't hear his heartbeat anymore. Only the buzzing. It was starting to get loud. It kinda hurt.

 

\---------------------------------------------------------

 

"......Zimms!! Jack!"

Jack heard Kent's voice through the haze in his own mind. He said he was fine.

"Jack, fuck!! Man, wake up!!"

(Kenny, stop yelling, I said I'm fine.)

"Fuck, dude, don't do this to me..."

(Are you crying? What happened?)

"Jacky... c'mon... wake...... up........"

 

\---------------------------------------------------------

 

Beeping.

Rhythmic beeping, steady. Like a heartbeat.

(Mine?)

Jack opened his eyes and looked around. Soft, calming yellow walls, a blue-green floor that looked a bit like vomit. Jack grimaced. (Where-)

"You're awake..."

"....Kenny."

Kent got up from the chair beside the hospital bed Jack had been sleeping in. His eyes were green, matching the cap he wore on his head and the shoes on his feet ("To match your stupid yellow ones, Zimms"). "Hey, Jack. Took too many downers, huh?"

"Where am I?"

".....Rehab, bro."

Jack's senses were slow. "Rehab...? Why?"

"You nearly bit it, dude. ODed." Kent's voice was flat.

It was hard to focus, edges of his vision going black. Kent's hair glowed. "I..."

 

 ---------------------------------------------------------

 

".....Jack?"

"Am I awake?"

Kent's laugh was slightly sarcastic. "Kinda. Look, I've gotta beat it. Got a plane to catch in an few hours."

"Wait, Kenny."

The footsteps stopped right inside the door.

"Who found me?"

There was a long silence before Kent just walked away.

 

 ---------------------------------------------------------

 

 ("Accident?")

Jack shook his head. It wasn't an accident. Not entirely.

("Attempted suicide?")

Maybe. A part of him wondered if his subconscious wanted out. Wanted silence.

No one would listen.

("Cry for help?")

Sure. His mind was a wreck. He wondered what he did wrong. Wondered why he couldn't function right. He'd always thought that. What made him this.... broken.

"Attempted suicide," a therapist said, getting a scoff from Jack. (Why do they have to put a label on it?)

"Just wanted to get high. I'm not suicidal." (Yes, you are.)

He hated the pity glances from everyone. He hated the sadness in Papa's eyes. He hated the smudged makeup on Maman's cheeks.

He hated himself most for doing that to them. It wasn't their fault they had him. It's not their fault he turned out fucked up.

For not dying when he tried.


End file.
